A
Family Downfall
- A Memoir Intended to Teach -
by Josie Magie
Review by Maria Teresa De Donato
A compelling novel with strong psychological and
pedagogical insight, A Family Downfall - A memoir intended to teach fascinates
the reader from start to finish, projecting him into the behavioral dynamics
that occur within a family unit, and making him feel involved.
The book is full of interesting themes and aspects that embrace the entire
sphere of human life. The novel begins, in fact, with a detailed description of
what was for many years the imposing three-story house in which the author
lived, with its magnificent garden and the lion statues that adorned it. All
this testifies to the achievement of the high social status of a couple of
Spanish emigrants who, despite coming from humble families, manage to make their
way, with perseverance, determination, and even at the cost of hard sacrifices,
and achieve 'the American dream', guaranteeing, at least for many years, great
prosperity, and economic-financial well-being for their family.
Despite evident material wealth, problems, however, afflict the family. In
addition to the difficulties related to learning a foreign language and the
consequent integration into a new culture and social organization, the major
problems are to be found, paradoxically, precisely within human limits,
sometimes difficult to identify and overcome, which often originate from the
very parents. Despite, in fact, the noble values that regulate their lives
and despite the laudable intention of raising their children in the best
possible way, giving them all that they themselves have never had, they assume
drastic attitudes which, without realizing it, will lead to failure when not to
catastrophe.
Stubbornness and perfectionism, on the one hand; an overprotective attitude
characterized by unjustified fears that will subsequently lead to real anguish,
on the other hand; projecting one's own desires, unfulfilled expectations, onto
one’s children; and setting goals which are as unattainable as they are
undesired for their children, depriving them of the opportunity to grow
spontaneously, to choose their own path, to have their own experiences and also
to run the risk of failing, but also of getting up, of resuming walking and
learning valuable life lessons at the same time.
These dynamics within the family unit manifest themselves from the beginning
and, having the family members no awareness of them, they persist over the
years, increasing the level of the dysfunctionality of the family members as
well as of their relationships, and causing problems, such as drug and alcohol
addictions, that not only worsen over time, but reach the point of no return
and, in some cases, lead to disaster.
Anger, frustration, discomfort, anguish, pain, helplessness, and resentment are
all feelings that are expressed in this context and that Josie Magie herself
felt.
Endowed with great intellectual acumen, despite the emotional involvement she
underwent, having experienced in first person the events described and having
paid a high price for them somatizing through her own emotional sufferings, the
author demonstrates great analytical ability in the detailed description of the
emergence, the manifestation and the development of certain behavioral
dynamics, but also of mental and psychological ones, which she seems to have
observed and understood from an early age.
Despite the poignant nature of the novel, it is imbued with a feeling of deep
family love that will never fade and with a subtle melancholy due to Josie's
awareness of the great potential that existed in every family member and that,
unfortunately, for one reason or another, not all of them were able to
identify, to express and to fulfill in life.
The subtitle, A Memoir Intended to Teach is, therefore, mainly an
invitation that the author extends to the readers - parents, and children - so
that her own experience and consequent suffering can serve as an inspiring
cautionary warning and life lesson to avoid making certain mistakes and
triggering certain unhealthy and disastrous dynamics, and rather to live a life
worth living and in full harmony with one's nature, one's needs, and one's
potential.
A very beautiful and at the same time poignant novel that I recommend to
everyone.
